


하나하키병대위 (hanahakidge)

by razzledazzle27



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: 'goddamnit another case of the flowers? shit i thought we did this already', 'if it's my time to go it's my time to go', ALLURA AND LANCE ARE DATING BUT THEY ACT LIKE SIBLINGS SO ?????????????, F/M, Hanahaki Disease, Keith (Voltron) Needs a Hug, Tired Shiro (Voltron), allurance and kidge hanahaki au, literally pidge gives no fucks, pidge gets so jealous so easily this disease is hard on my daughter, they're all tired tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2019-04-06
Packaged: 2019-09-01 04:33:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16758031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/razzledazzle27/pseuds/razzledazzle27
Summary: "you made flowers grow in my lungs, and although they are beautiful, i cannot breathe." - unknown





	1. Juniberry

**Author's Note:**

> FUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW I WROTE THIS AS A JOKE AND GOT WAY TOO INVESTED
> 
> WARNING: HANAHAKI DISEASE
> 
> here's a pocket guide to wtf that shit is
> 
> so the hanahaki disease is an illness born from unrequited love, where the victim’s throat will fill up with flowers. i know, weird. they will then proceed to throw, and cough up the petals and flowers, which is supposed to be super painful. one of the only ways to cure hanahaki is if the victim's crush returns the feeling (it can’t be resolved with friendship, it has to be genuine feelings of love so oof). the infection can also be removed through surgery, though the feelings disappear along with the petals. if they refuse to go through with the surgery, or the feeling is not returned in time, then the patient’s lungs will fill up with flowers, and will eventually suffocate. fun stuff.
> 
> there is no specific flower for the disease, but it’ll either be the crushes favourite type of flower, or their favourite colour. we can only hope for the patients, and pray that the crushes favourite flower isn’t a type of rose. i, being me, won't make any promises.

Lance had acted weird for a few days.

Monday:

_“Lance? Are you okay?” Lance threw a thumbs up at the other paladins, again not uttering a word. Hunk arched an eyebrow. “Are you sure?” Lance nodded, yet he struggled to do so. It was like something was caught in his throat._

Tuesday:

_The paladins were receiving mission debriefing when Lance started coughing uncontrollably. Shiro surged forward, catching the Blue Paladin before he could fall. “Lance, what happened?!” His eyes shone with tears, but Lance shook his head. He wasn’t looking at Shiro, or anyone else. There was a bloodied pink petal on the floor._

Wednesday:

_“Come on, Lance, it’s time to wake up, we've got training.” Lance didn’t move from his bed. Pidge sighed, tugging on his arm. “Lance.” Lance didn’t so much as take a breath. He didn’t breathe. “...Lance?” For the first time, Pidge saw his face, eyes wide with horror, tears pouring like a waterfall. His hands were clenched around his neck. “Oh, god, breathe Lance! Breathe!” She helped him sit up, and socked him in the gut, causing him to gasp and cough. Just when she was about to call Keith to come help, Lance hacked something out of his throat. He was breathing again, but Pidge was staring at the daisy that had fallen from Lance’s mouth._

Finally, Thursday came, and Pidge’s suspicions were proven true.

_It had been a particularly hard battle, and the paladins were trudging back into the castle when Lance collapsed. He tried to steady himself by grabbing onto Keith, but that just resulted in the two of them on their knees, Lance’s head down. “That’s it, Lance, what’s going on? You’ve been acting differently for days now; tell us what’s wrong.” Keith’s tone was demanding, but Lance refused to pick his head up, shaking it vigorously. A loud cough. A shudder. Lance curled in on himself even more._

_The other paladins were watching at a close distance, ready to jump in if something happened. Keith’s frown deepened, though his eyes looked more worried than angry. “Lance.” Slowly, Lance relented and raised his head, revealing something that sprung tears to each of the other paladins’ eyes._

_A massive, ancient juniberry was blocking Lance’s mouth; the flower was stained with blood. He looked around at them with tear-stricken eyes. Keith didn’t say anything, just pulled Lance to his shoulder, letting the Blue Paladin cry to the best of his ability. The remaining paladins joined the hug, each face solemn. Pidge was across from Lance’s face, both leaning on Keith’s chest, the Red Paladin holding them both close to him. She had never seen Lance so sad, so vulnerable. His arm wrapped around Keith’s neck, his back hugged by Hunk and Shiro, his mouth clogged by a flower of death._

_Lance had the hanahaki disease. But for who?_

_Then the Alteans entered. Coran and Allura watched for a moment, obviously trying to read the situation. Shiro squeezed Lance’s shoulders before standing up and explaining the condition to the aliens. Coran started crying, rightfully so. Allura just stared off into space. Seeing the princess, Lance fussed and tugged on Keith, obviously wanting a way out. The Red Paladin didn’t move, but he regarded Allura carefully._

_Allura walked over in a haze, still processing the information and the prospect of Lance’s probable death. Pidge could feel Lance tense across from her, another tear rolling down his cheek. Allura knelt in front of the clump of paladins. Hunk and Pidge moved back, Hunk placing a comforting hand on Lance’s shoulder. Barely thinking, Pidge seized Keith’s hand. Keith looked surprised but squeezed it, offering a weak smile. A flutter swept Pidge’s stomach. Not now._

_Lance pushed away from Keith and sat on his own, forcing himself to look at her, tears pouring faster and harder. Allura clamped a hand over her mouth, eyes fixed on the juniberry. Lance choked again and lowered his head. Allura reached forward and lifted his chin, carefully avoiding the petals. Lance hesitantly looked up again, and she pressed his forehead to her own. Their tears mixed, and slowly, carefully, the antique perennial wilted. For each tear Allura shed, a petal withered, which was a good thing since Allura was practically sobbing. Realisation hit Pidge like a truck. Allura loved him back. The hanahaki disease was cured._

_Allura pressed a chaste kiss to Lance’s brow as he unceremoniously spit out the last of the flower, panting and coughing. She giggled, wiping her eye clean of any tears. Lance smiled at her, interlacing their fingers. “Thank you.”_

That was months ago. Now, Pidge felt her own throat begin to tickle with petals and leaves. Not good.


	2. Rose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance turned to her. “Pidge has hanahaki.” Yep, she does. “No, I do not!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW ANOTHER ONE
> 
> these are going by fast tbh, i already have the next two chapters set
> 
> but anyway
> 
> enjoy this one
> 
> bye

It started during their evacuation of Ezor and Zethrid’s ship. Keith ordered Lance to lead the team to safety. When Lance asked where Keith was going, Pidge overheard: “Acxa saved our skins. I’m not gonna leave her hanging.” A sharp pain crashed through her body like a wave of agony. Pidge’s run staggered to a complete stop. Roots embedded themselves in her stomach, sending an unsettling feeling throughout her body. Something that felt like thorns poked the inside of her throat. Lance arched an eyebrow at Keith’s back but ultimately herded the rest to the lions. Not even stopping to question Pidge, he scooped the Green Paladin up in his arms and ran into Red, Romelle waiting for them.

“What happened?” Lance didn’t respond, just grabbed the nearest water pack and shoved it into Pidge’s hand. “Drink. Now.” Pidge sighed. “I just tripped, okay, I’m fine.” But she knew she wasn’t. Lance shot a glare that he shouldn’t have been able to deliver. “I’m not asking, Pidge. I don’t want you going through what I barely survived.” Romelle glanced between the two. “Is someone going to explain whatever happened to me?” Lance turned to her. “Pidge has hanahaki.” _Yep, I do._ “No, I do not! It’s not hanahaki, Lance! I just fell!” Romelle’s hand flew to her mouth. “You mean the flower disease? Oh no, Pidge, I hear it’s painful, I’m so sorry.” Pidge groaned. “I can’t believe this. I totter once and suddenly I have a deadly--” She stopped short. Oh no. “Pidge?”

A prickly feeling shot through her body, and Pidge hacked, pounding her chest. She coughed up a red petal. The three stared at it. “Okay, maybe I do have hanahaki.”

Mass hysteria. Romelle started screaming and sobbing, hugging Pidge tightly. “Who is it?? I’ll make them love you, I promise!” Lance started pacing the floor, running a hand through his hair. “Is it contagious? Did I spread it? No, it’d have to be for the same person. It’s not for Allura, right?” When Pidge shook her head, he sighed of relief and resumed pacing. “Gah, what do I do, what do I do, she can’t go through it, she can’t take it. I’m gonna call in our medic.”

Five doboshes later, Hunk was shining a light down Pidge’s throat, Shiro tagging along to provide moral support. Their expressions were grim. “Roses. The worst kind. They mean denial and suffering.” Hunk said, wringing his shirt. Pidge opened her mouth to probably make a snarky comment, but no sound came out. She tapped Shiro’s shoulder, and tapped her throat, making him understand. Pidge had bypassed the second stage of hanahaki. Allura, Coran and Krolia entered Red, wondering about the delay in departure. Lance fidgeted. “We’re waiting for Keith, but we’ve run into a slight dilemma…”

Five more doboshes. Pidge was sitting on Krolia’s lap, the Galran’s motherly instincts in full effect. Coran was blubbering again, and Allura was wracking her brain along with Lance.

“How could she have caught it so quickly after you?”

“I don’t know, maybe it’s just a coincidence.”

“Well, it’s not a very good coincidence.”

“Do you think she could’ve had this before now and we just never noticed?”

“Oh, what if you’re right? What kind of friends would we be if we didn’t notice?”

“What’s going on?”

Everyone turned to see Keith standing there with Acxa, a concerned expression settled on his face. His eyes swept over Pidge sitting on Krolia’s lap. “Seriously, what is going on.” Acxa shifted uncomfortably, looking as though she felt like she was intruding. Which she was.

Pidge felt an unbearable ache in her chest. It was like all the happiness had gone from the universe, and it was replaced by bitter jealousy. She groaned. All eyes turned to her. Pidge frantically looked away from Keith, petals welling up in her throat, and she gagged before they poured out of her mouth. Krolia’s grip tightened on her as everyone gaped. “That’s what’s going on,” she stated as Pidge coughed up a leaf. Keith was unreadable. “We have to get to Earth. Now.” The team simultaneously nodded, each person knowing there was nothing to be done right then. They’d have to hurry.

They ended up around a campfire, talking about Acxa. Pidge was less than happy. Yet, she was seated next to Keith, which made her feel a little better, especially with his arm wrapped around her waist. He looked like he wanted to hurry up and get out of there, which Pidge sympathised with. Keith was politely speaking with Acxa, but his eyes said it all: _I have to get out of here so I can save my future wife’s life so we can live out our lives happily with three kids and a dog named_ \--stop kidding yourself, Pidge. She bitterly spat out a rose leaf, causing Lance and Allura to frown at her.

While the pain in Pidge’s throat and stomach was literally intolerable and agonizing, so far she hadn’t had much trouble breathing, but that was probably going to come later. Not much later. She was already mute and coughed occasionally, making people look at her worriedly. It was kind of funny actually. When Lance had hanahaki, he tried to keep it hidden from the others. Pidge had sort of accepted her fate. Maybe it was her connection to nature that tied her to the disease.

Pidge had been zoning out, trying to focus on not fucking dying, but she caught Acxa saying: “--and it led me to you.” The soft smile made Pidge’s stomach churn, and she bit back the temptation to throw up. At least, she tried to. Another spew of rose petals. _Smooth._

Hunk and Romelle winced. “Pidge, maybe you should lie down.” Shiro proposed, holding out an arm to help her to her lion. Pidge shook her head, instead, she pulled her knees up to her chest, rocking back and forth. The feeling of jealousy hadn’t left her system completely, and it only surged again whenever Acxa opened her mouth. A thorn jabbed her throat, causing a cough. Keith’s grasp tightened on her waist, and he pulled Pidge closer to him. The Green Paladin fought the urge to smirk at Acxa and leaned on Keith’s shoulder.

Within another fifteen doboshes, they were back on the road. _Finally._ Lance and Keith had bickered about who got to take Pidge with them in their lion. “I’ve had the disease before, I know how to help her!” Lance’s argument made more sense, but the fact that Keith was fighting for her made Pidge’s roses hurt a little less. “Yeah? Well...I’m the leader! I get to pick!” Shiro sighed next to Pidge, muttering something that sounded like “ _Why me,”_

Lance huffed and began to protest. Keith pointed each time he tried to speak.

“That’s not--”

“Buh.”

“I can--”

“Nuh.”

“Wait--”

“No.”

“KEITH--”

“Stop.”

The Black Paladin smirked at the fuming Red Paladin. “You were the one that said I’m the leader, so I’m the leader. And as the leader, what I say goes. Pidge, you’re with me.” Lance’s eyes narrowed, but he backed off anyway, sulking on Allura’s shoulder.

It was quiet in the Black Lion’s cockpit, despite the four people. Shiro kept checking behind them, confirming that Green was tailing Black. Pidge was back on Krolia’s lap, which was somehow comforting. Krolia _was_ the closest thing she had to a mom out in space. Keith was listening to Lance and Allura flirt shamelessly, and then private-lining Hunk so the two could complain without interrupting. Occasionally, he’d look back at Pidge and offered a soft smile. She would return it, and he’d turn back to Black’s controls, satisfied.

Eventually, Pidge found herself falling asleep, miraculously, what with the flowers threatening to suffocate her. Before she ultimately drifted off, she heard Keith answer Hunk’s question about Pidge’s survival chances. “No, she’ll be fine. Pidge is strong. She can take hard hits like this. It’s one of the things I like about her actually.”

Pidge felt herself smile as she slipped away to a dreamless, painful sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> keith is literally the king of shutting people up in this essay i will


	3. Thorns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OOF SORRY IT'S SO LATE
> 
> this one's a little shorter, but i swear i'll give you a nice long one soon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> um idk just read it and my other fics i guess and enjoy (dON'T FORGET TO LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE GREAT CONTENT)
> 
> oh yeah and merry christmas uwu

The road to home was the hardest. The random Galra attacks made the team uneasy, and Pidge nauseous. Of course, everyone kept telling her: “Hang in there,’ or “It’s going to be okay,” to which Pidge wanted to reply with: “No, it’s not, I’m fucking dying.” But, then again, she was currently mute, and totally dependant on her space family. 

However, not having to speak made it easier to think. Hunk had insisted Pidge stay in the Black Lion whenever an attack occurred, which was absolutely fine by her. It was like a private space to think about her impending death while her friends risked their lives outside. And she couldn’t do anything about it. Okay, maybe it was a little upsetting.

But, there was one thing she always looked forward to when there was a battle. Before he went down to fight, Keith would ruffle Pidge’s hair and tell her to stay safe, and then he’d send a soft smile back at her before heading down. Pidge ended up a wheezing mess the first time. 

Still, the fact that she couldn’t help in the slightest hurt her insides. Or maybe that was the roses pricking her throat again. Pidge hacked up another leaf, glaring at it.  _ Why do I even have this dumb disease? Keith cares about me. As a friend.  _

She slumped in Krolia’s seat, spinning around in it like a child in their mother’s whirley chair in an office.  _ That’s probably why. As a friend. He has her, the pretty and athletic Acxa. So independent. So collected. But does he like Acxa, even? Does he like anyone? Is there any chance for me at all? _

_....Am I being paranoid? _

Pidge made a weird noise that she thought was a groan and coughed up another petal. It hurt to know like this. To know that if Keith didn’t develop romantic feelings for her, she would die. To know that they probably wouldn’t reach Earth in time for surgical removal; she’d be too far gone. To know. 

Pidge watched Hunk and Lance scream and run while Galra lasers chased after them. She half-smiled. They would always be there to make her laugh. That’s one thing. Allura cracked her whip and decapitated at least ten sentries. Pidge nodded appreciatively, even though no one was in the cockpit to witness her approval. Allura would always be like the sister she never had. That’s another thing. 

And watching Keith slash at guards left and right, occasionally looking over his shoulder at the Black Lion, as if checking on Pidge… well, it made the roses that clogged her windpipe ache a little less.

She shakily sighed, trying in vain to dislodge some of the petals from her oesophagus. She watched her teammates destroy Galran sentinels in her name, which was pleasing. Everything seemed fine, that is until she saw it happen. 


	4. Let Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is w a y overdue i am so so sorry for making you all wait this long !!!!
> 
> i really hope it was worth it, though it is a little short
> 
> enjoyyyy <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "A D O R A   
> u m u s t LET GO"
> 
> yes i watch she-ra who doesn't

Everything seemed fine, that is until she saw it happen. A sentry, sneaking behind a control panel. Seemingly harmless, but Pidge saw the way the Galran was rerouting the power cables. It was trying to enhance the fighting capabilities of the guards. It was trying to make it easier for them to kill her friends. 

Heart racing, Pidge tugged on her helmet and coughed, hoarsely at first, then so loud all four of the paladins were forced to look up at her. Pain was searing away at her throat, but she pointed to the control panel. Hunk, being competent, got the message and shot the sentry down before the cables were completely redirected. Minor crisis averted.

Keith smiled the way that always gave Pidge butterflies. “Thanks for the heads-up, Pidge. Stay safe.” Pidge sent a thumbs up through Black’s windshielded eyes, then ultimately rushed to the bathroom and spewed more petals. She found herself spending more and more time in the bathroom, which really scared her.  _ I don’t want to die. _

Pidge walked out and returned to the console, running her hand along the panel. Black sent a contented purr through her mind, a sound of comfort. Pidge watched the battle die down, the paladins and the rest of her team coming out on top.  _ I don’t want to leave them. _

Pidge thought about the roses building up in her stomach and the thorns that pierced her throat every time she made to take a breath. It was starting to hurt. It was starting to make her feel faint. It was starting.  _ I need to let go. _

_ I can’t keep loving him.  _ The more Pidge thought of him, the more it hurt. She was killing herself like this. She was going to die because of Keith. 

_ I can’t keep loving him.  _ She wouldn’t make it to Earth. She’d be way too stubborn and by the time they’d reach the doctors, it’ll be too late. She was going to die in space. Matt, and her father, and her  _ mother _ . God, what would Coleen do when only two out of the three family members she’d lost returned, and in the place of her daughter, a man in a Garrison uniform trying to explain what had happened to her baby girl, a stoic, raven-haired boy the cause of it all.

_ I can’t keep loving him. So, why haven’t I stopped? _

Pidge sank to the floor and folded in on herself. She coughed and her shoulders shook, tears threatening her eyes.

_ A loud cough. A shudder. Lance curled in on himself even more.  _

Pidge had never felt so alone and scared. She didn’t know when she’d suddenly just choke on a flower and die. But at the same time, she knew it was coming. She felt incredibly helpless.

_ She had never seen Lance so vulnerable. _

Pideg choked up a whole rose and the tears fell. She sobbed there on the floor, watching the blood drip from the petals on the flower next to her.

_ For each tear Allura shed, a petal withered. _

No one was crying for Pidge but herself. And that hurt way more than some thorns clogging her windpipe. 

She must stop loving him. It’s for the best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what do you mean lions don't have bathrooms


	5. Liar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What a liar I am.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm back with more angst :D

Pidge was quiet when Krolia, Shiro, and Keith returned. She’d cleaned up the rose petals and blood and sat in a chair, calmly waiting for her friends to come back.  _ And for death.  _

It was pretty obvious that the others noticed something was wrong, well, more wrong. Krolia offered her seat to Pidge, but she politely declined. Pidge took to the window, watching the stars fly by the lion as it sped past. 

Fairly soon, Shiro called for bedtime and each of the lions landed on a small moon. They decided to camp out, and although Keith was beside her around the fire, Pidge felt anumbed to the whole of her surroundings. 

Of course that worried people. Romelle and Hunk kept casting side-glances, Lance tried to joke for her, and Allura pried for some sign that Pidge was fine. But she wasn’t. Even if she affirmed she was okay, she’d be lying. Pidge was hurting both emotionally and physically. And the fact that Keith was oblivious to his grave role in her case made Pidge’s stomach churn all the more.

Soon, somehow, Pidge was able to fall asleep. But that didn’t guarantee a peaceful rest.

Pidge opened her eyes in a dream. It took place in what looked like a wasteland, and her team was there. But not Pidge. Well, not really.

Allura, Coran, and Romelle all sat solemnly in a circle, staring blankly at a fire, dry tear marks on their faces. Krolia sat perched on the nearby Green Lion, a single tear tracing her cheek as she gazed up at the stars. And Shiro and the other paladins? 

They were fighting. Keith was yelling at Shiro, as the elder tried to defend himself. Lance was trying in vain to pull them apart, but it was harder than it should’ve been, for thick, fresh tears were pouring from his eyes.

_ “Why didn’t you tell me?!”  _ Keith was shouting. Hot tears stained his red cheeks as he took a ragged breath.  _ “If I’d known, I could’ve done something! I could’ve saved her—”  _ Shiro interrupted, silent tears of his own dripping.  _ “What would you do, kiss her? If you’d known, it wouldn’t’ve fixed anything! You couldn’t have stopped her if you tried.”  _ Lance clung to Keith’s shoulder, tugging on it weakly and occasionally sobbing into it.  _ “Guys, please, stop...she wouldn’t’ve wanted this…”  _

Hunk was hunched over something. Someone.  _ “Pidge...please...we...we gotta go home..wake up…please, wake up...” _

_ Wake up! _

  
“Pidge? Wake up, it’s time to get a move on. We gotta get back to Earth.” Pidge opened her eyes again, this time fully awake. Hunk tilted his head from above her. “How’re you feeling?” Pidge smiled and held out a thumbs-up.  _ What a liar I am. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you decide; 
> 
> does pidge:
> 
> \- confess when she and keith are alone and she has time before the hanahaki kicks in  
> \- confess on the spur of the moment (probably during a battle) and right when she'd die


	6. Keith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It wasn’t like he loved her back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally we see emo boi's take on all of this shit

Entering the Milky Way again after so long should’ve been the most gratifying moment in Keith’s whole Voltron/Marmora/weird space adventure thing, but for some reason, he wasn’t looking at the beautiful star system swirling in front of him as the Lions flew towards Earth. 

Pidge had been different since they got back from the battle with the sentries. She seemed more distant, which was less assuring. Keith wouldn’t say he was angry, but this whole experience rubbed him the wrong way. Why should Pidge have to suffer when she should be celebrating with the rest of the team on their return to Earth? And it wasn’t even over yet, they still had to beat the Galra and bring peace to the universe, once and for all.

That wasn’t the only thing that upset him.

Who did this to her? Who was so much of a dumbass and so oblivious that she was in love with them that it had pushed Pidge to the breaking point? When they found out who it was, Keith was going to slap them across the face. 

So here he was, watching as Pidge simply stared blankly at the stars, a single tear rolling down her cheek. The thorns from her roses must be painful. A sting struck Keith’s heart. _ Why did he feel so...guilty? _

Surely, he couldn't have done this. It was strange how the flowers were roses and the flowers he liked the best happened to be roses, but Keith could’ve sworn that Hunk had told him that roses were his favourite too. 

Certainly, Keith wasn’t the oblivious dumbass that let Pidge get to this point.

It wasn’t like he knew how her face lit up every time he agreed with her. 

It wasn’t like he noticed how she did her best to understand his motives as a leader.

It wasn’t like he couldn’t take his eyes off of her during their group hug before the Marmora shift.

It wasn’t like he saw the red that dusted her cheeks when he’d squeezed her hand back when Lance had hanahaki.

It wasn’t like he loved her back. 

Right?

Pidge stirred and touched her throat, and for a second it looked as though the pain had eased. Out of the corner of his eye, Keith watched as she took large breaths, inhaling as much air as she could. Krolia rubbed her back, and the smaller smiled at her. The discomfort seemed to be thinning. The person, whoever they may be, must be realising their feelings for her, which was good for her.

But possibly bad for him? If Pidge’s literal crush liked her back, then it was a guarantee that they’d get together once this was all over. And that would leave Keith alone with his confusing feelings.

However, Keith was sure of one thing. There was no way that he was going to let Pidge Holt die.


End file.
